WHY DO OUR KIDS GO BOOM AFTER SCHOOL?
I hear weekly from parents who have children, who come home from school and RAGE.
How the rage is often aimed at parents, siblings or other close family members and is usually personal.
It's not uncommon to hear how the school report back with
"we don't see any of this behaviour at school"
usually followed by
"we don't even see the tics" .
I actually read on a forum this week of a poor parent who was told from school
"he just saves this behaviour for you"
What teachers aren't realising is that these kids are masking their disorders to "fit in" and then exploding once in the comfort of their 'safe space' which is usually their home , some don't even make it home, with parents reporting that the minute their child is in the car they begin to unravel.
Let's imagine our children are a bottle of fizzy pop. Every time they try to fit in at school , whether that is by holding in tics, masking anxiety, stopping impulsions, coping with change, friendship issues or fighting co-occurring symptoms, their bottle shakes.
Their bottle can shake all throughout the day and in many cases this is what is happening.
Then when our children are home, one demand from a parent, sibling or family member can flip the lid off and BOOOM they explode, all their fizzy pop (frustration, discomfort, overwhelm etc) comes flying out.
It's so incredibly hard to deal with but it's vital to remember that many of our children they really do not mean it. .
What our children need is what I like to call "fizzy breaks". These are breaks throughout their school day to go and let out some bubbles from their bottle of fizzy pop.
This maybe to do some relaxation to calm anxiety, a run around the play ground to help with attention, a room to go and let out tics if they are holding them in in class, or even a support worker to talk about their challenges for that day.
These fizzy breaks should be used to support your child with whatever they need, to be able to release some of the building pressure throughout the day.
It's imperative that children are there to participate in the fizzy break planning.
By implementing this simple strategy, and if used correctly, these after school explosions should decrease if not stop entirely.
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